This past weekend was quite an emotional one. Chemo was on Friday and that always sucks. Shelby's birthday party was on Saturday and I actually made it thru, even danced a few dances -- I shouldn't have, but I did. :) Sunday morning, I woke up to get ready for church and when I began to wash what little hair I had, I realized my hands were covered in hair. It was really sad. I knew it was coming, but I suppose it was kind of like a looming death of someone who has been ill, you know it's going to happen, but when it happens nothing quite prepares you for the overwhelming emotions. I couldn't believe it! I sat in the shower for an hour and cried hysterically while I repeatedly ran my hands over my head. Needless to say, me and my puffy eyes didn't make it to church. That night Bobby razor shaved the remaining few hairs for me, so now we are sporting matching white shiny bowling balls. I've noticed my eyebrows have started to thin out, too - time to get out the sharpie and draw them in! :) BUT on the upside, I've done 2 of the 4 crappy treatments with the medicine that really knocks my socks off. After that, I will do 4 treatments of another medicine and I hear it won't be near as bad as the first go round. It amazes me that it takes such powerful and dangerous chemicals to rid my body of the cancer cells. I can't wait to eat what I want to eat, when I want to eat and chase it down with a beer. Seriously, I can't wait!!!! My esophagus is so jacked up, the only thing that goes down comfortably is KFC Mashed Potatoes and Gravy. Yummy!!
I get a 3 week break between treatments this time because WE ARE GOING TO DISNEYLAND ON SUNDAY!!!!! Mickey called the house this morning to tell the kids how excited he and Minnie are to see us. Seriously, I'm not sure who is more excited, Bobby and I or the kids! It's going to be a fantastic week. I don't think the kids have any idea what they are in for!!!
I want to thank each and everyone of you who have sent messages and cards. They truly mean so much and even though I don't always have the chance to respond to each individual message, I want you to know that they ALWAYS help bring my spirits up....even if it's just for 10 minutes. A positive attitude is hard to come by these days, so the messages are always wonderful to read and hear. If I haven't said it lately, CANCER SUCKS! I can't wait to have this part of my life behind me. Take care everyone!
2 comments:
Oh hattie Im soooo happy you guys are going to Disney! You deserve it! As for loosing your hair I cant even imagine! A friend of mine who was diagnosed a few years ago made me shave her head before she even lost it, she was too afraid to see hair falling out! But just think of it as your hair needs to go with the Cancer, so you can have Clean new beautiful hair to come in to top off your fresh start of being Cancer free!!! Right? :) Love you guys!
Hatti, Bob and I chat about often and pray that you and your family find the strength to overcome this difficult time and remember to stay positive. You are an amazingly brave woman and have a fabulous family- God bless all of you.
Bob and Karen Carstensen
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